Are you a worrier? I am guilty of worrying, even when the situation doesn’t warrant it. This article is more of a self note, a gentle reminder that chronic worrying doesn’t do anything good for your body or mind. If you are a constant worrier, tell these 7 things to yourself to lower or even clear out your worries at that moment. Here’s how to stop worrying.
Things to Tell Yourself to Stop Worrying
We all have problems of varying degrees and worries don’t escape us. But we must decide when it is actually something to worry about and when you can still move forward without it. It can affect your mental health as well as physical health. Stress and worry can steal your happiness for that day, days to come or even weeks or months. So, the first good thing is that you recognise that you need to stop worrying, which is a step in the right direction. Now, let’s look at all the things you can tell yourself to calm down in that moment of stress.
1. Worrying does not change the outcome whatever it is.
It’s true, isn’t it? If you really look at the concept of worrying, it’s just constantly thinking about something, creating scenarios in your head and imagining the worst. A gut feeling is different, worrying is consistent. Whatever is going to happen, remember that worrying does not change things. If you go ahead and worry about something bad happening all day and it doesn’t, you will have successfully spent your whole day unhappy. Instead, let life flow and you flow with it. You cannot force things or people or situations. So why stress yourself about it? Whatever happens, believe in yourself that you will be able to handle it and come out stronger from it.
2. Worrying causes emotional & physical fatigue.
Spend one day without worrying about a thing – not your partner, not your boss, not anyone else. See how free you feel and how a weight gets lifted off your shoulders. Worry, anger and resentment are feelings that cause immense fatigue. Therapy can help you work with these emotions and eventually lower with time.
“A day of worry is more exhausting than a day of work.” – John Lubbock
3. Stressing about it doesn’t solve the problem.
It’s highly unlikely like stressing about something is going to give you the solution of the problem you are facing. Instead, reach out to friends or family and talk to them about your issues. You can also talk about it on relevant subreddits to get opinions from people who have been through something similar. Find solutions, but don’t stress because it will not help you.
4. It usually isn’t as bad as you are thinking.
Our minds have a way of picturising things to go bad in such a way that it most likely won’t happen in real life. As a Swedish Proverb says, “Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow.” Don’t create a situation in your mind that will give you more pain than what is really happening in reality. Don’t imagine the worst. If possible, don’t imagine at all. Try your best to live in the present everyday and eventually it will become a habit.
“Somehow our devils are never quite what we expect when we meet them face to face.” – Nelson DeMille
5. It gets you nowhere.
Erma Bombeck says it best – “Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere.” When you worry, there is no destination because the journey itself is long, dull and dreadful. Simply tell yourself – what will be, will be. What has to happen, will happen. That’s when your worries will feel pointless because as I mentioned before, it does not change the outcome.
6. Don’t bring along yesterday’s burden and don’t take tomorrow’s worry.
You deserve better – you don’t have to load yourself up with burdens of past stresses and the next day’s worries. Leave the past behind and let the future you handle the future. You are a badass, you will be able to handle it. You weren’t made so strong for nothing. Life is a game and problems help you level up your character. Remind yourself that and always be prepared to stay strong through it all, come what may.
7. Don’t sweat the small stuff.
Do you find yourself worrying about something someone said? Or something someone did? They might be moving on about their day without thinking about it, but here you are, worrying about why they said or did that. Instead, don’t sweat the small stuff and most of the times, it is small stuff. If you want to, address it in a gentle manner with the concerned person at a time when you both are calmer. If you don’t want to, simply let it go. Letting go and forgiveness play a big role for your own peace of mind. You don’t want to be attached to a dark aura for an entire day just because you couldn’t let go – life is too short for that.
Overall, when you worry, your face will show it and your mind, body and soul will feel it. Why put yourself through this torture, right? Instead, choose to keep yourself busy in something productive, watch something funny (there’s no shortage of short or long form content online!). Draw, paint, write, listen to music, meditate – do anything you love.
I hope this helped you change your thought process a little bit and you can calm your mind and heart. For more detailed information, this article by helpguide will be useful.